20 Avril: au revoir pour maintenant

We had our last Mass in Ambialet today. I was completely touched by all the old men and women who each gave us hugs and "la bise"- the kisses on the cheek. It was incredibly sweet and they all genuinely seemed sad that we were leaving. Pere Jame gave a very nice speech about us, mentioning how he had been moved by our participation and eagerness to be a part of the Church and the community. We knew that we would bring some life to Ambialet , but I never thought they would take us in like they have. We sang "On Eagle's Wing's" for them this week after Communion and Alexia sang "Ave Marie" in Latin, which was absolutely beautiful. They said goodbye to us as though we were their grandchildren moving away.

I think what's most sad about leaving is the fact that I have no idea if or when I would come back here. I won't be scared to anymore at least. I will know that I can make my way around, even if I don't know the language. But I don't know who I will be at that point or if I will be able to travel or anything. It's a weird thought- saying goodbye to something and having no idea if you can come back. Or knowing that when you come back, you're life will be entirely different. I've never had to experience that before. I am ready to come home- I miss everyone so much. But I will miss a lot of things about this place.

I am going to miss cheese and baguettes- I've become addicted. I'm going to go through serious withdrawal when I get home. It's a staple to my diet and according to everyone here, you can't get their stuff back in the States. I believe them. I never thought I would enjoy unpasteurized cheese so much. I'm going to miss the wine. And not only because I am legal to drink it over here. I like realizing the fact that I truly enjoy a glass with my dinner or while playing a board game or something like that. We were all so used to being home and drinking at parties and using is as a social boost, but really, no one over here drinks so much that they really get drunk. And if they do get drunk, it's not on purpose. It's a completely different younger scene than at home. I love how they drink over here and I wish we could really adjust the mindset of our young people.

I'm going to miss nature here in Ambialet. I've never lived in such a beautiful natural setting. I've never lived in the country and I could definitely see it's appeal. I loved the river and mountains and cliffs and everything in between. I loved going for a hike and not knowing where we would end up or what we would find. I love seeing the cute old ladies plowing their fields and the dozens of people who would hike up our mountain to see the amazing view. I'm going to miss all the dogs everywhere. Our dogs aren't nearly as trained back home.

As difficult as the language barrier has been for me, I know that it's going to help me in the long-run. Everything at home that would make me hesitant before seems so easy now- at least now I know the language! : ) This sounds really pathetic but it makes me very appreciative of the fact that I'm not mute or deaf. Yeah, I know, it's a weird realization but honestly, I don't think I would make it. I cannot stand not knowing what someone is saying or not being able to say more than basic sentences. I hate only being able to speak to survive. I would make it not fully knowing French but I wouldn't be able to fully communicate with anyone and that's the worst feeling.

I hope you all enjoyed my blog. I would love to do something like this again to keep my audience but I don't think my bank account will allow that. My college loans are going to have to take priority over my cultural experiences. But honestly, being here has made me miss home so much and I've grown an entirely new appreciation for my family and friends. A lot has happened at home since I've been gone and it'll be kind of weird to go back but I can't wait. I've always known that I had a loving family and dependable friends but it becomes even more obvious being physically separated for four months. It's bittersweet but I'm eager to be around familiar faces. (Who speak my language!) : )

8 Avril: "den you put zee hairs in your mouse"

Wine tasting yesterday! One of my favorite field trips, I think. We visited Gaillac, went through their museum, saw a vineyard, and did some wine tasting. The man who led our tour of the vineyard and distillery was pretty funny. He explained how difficult the market is now because all of these new competitors have arisen: Australia, California, Oregon, and China. Before these companies popped up, France didn't have to worry about marketing because Europe was the leader in wine producer- mainly because they were the only ones really producing the majority of the wine. But now, Gaillac is experiencing competition and they're not used to it. Then, for the wine tasting, he taught us how it is properly done. Hence, the title of my blog- something I couldn't help laughing at. As he was explaining the mechanics of breathing so that you truly "taste" the wine in your nose, he told us to "then, put the airs into your mouth," which, with his French accent, came out as "put the hairs into your mouse." I guess it's so funny because he said it with such a straight face and then was confused when we all laughed. We've all become experts at this Franglish thing.

6 Avril: "just to love and be loved in return"

Yesterday was a beautiful day- 70 degrees, sunny, crisp breeze. I never thought I would like to live in the country, but I definitely see the appeal in it, especially to live in the country for a summer or a few months of the year, like so many people do here. I've never been that much of an outdoorsy person really. I don't really look forward to exercising at home but here it's perfect because half the things I want to do outside are really good workouts. Most of us have been running up our huge hill as a workout. One run up and down on that, and you're pretty much set for the day. There's a nice trail that runs parallel to it to so that gives some variety as well. Karen, Tim and I went for a hike up the mountain across from ours that has the radio towers on top. It took us a good 45 minutes-hour to get to the top- it's incredibly steep the whole time but the views are just so amazing the further you go so it's one of those rewarding workouts. We also went for another bike ride and it's great to feel myself building more endurance each time we go.

After dinner, our director surprised us with the latest purchase for the monastery: it's first flat-screen TV! He had us all go into his office where he had it temporarily set up with the Moulin Rouge playing and nine chairs. And of course he didn't forget the peanut M&M's which have consistently been our junk food for various surprises. It's funny- I've never gone this long without watching TV but I've been realizing that I missed it only for the social aspect of it. I miss watching Gilmore Girls with my mom, or watching Steeler games with Danelle, or procrastinating at school as my housemates and I all watch stupid, funny movies. I don't miss actual shows all that much, I guess I just miss who I watch them with.

3 Avril: "n'est pas?"

Today we ventured out to Conques and Rocamadour, two towns that were main religious spots for pilgrims in the Middle Ages. We had a wonderful bus driver, Vincent, pronounced "Vanh-sahn." I still don't understand how he managed to maneuver that tour bus around those tiny, windy, French country roads. He had to toot his horn for every single turn we made where he couldn't see the oncoming traffic--which was approximately every 5-10 minutes. It was hard to sleep for the eight hours we were on the bus, to say the least. However, I was quite impressed with his driving skills but I guess you have to be used to it if you live there and your career is driving a tour bus. : )

Anyways, the towns were beautiful, as they always are around here. We saw some churches and relics and plenty of glorious medieval fortifications.

1 Avril: Poisson d'Avril

Another visit with Peter and Margaret today. We practiced singing some more songs for Church and had some tea of course. Margret was cute, she told us she's going to convince some of the church ladies to sing the Gloria in English for us, which was sweet. I've really realized how comforting my religion can be, as a foreigner in another country. Catholic, of course means universal, but I'm really truly feeling it here. Although the Mass in is another language, there's still something soothing in it's standardization.

Singing and following the readings during Mass really helps with learning French grammar and sentence structure. Singing some hymns in English makes me realize that I miss Mass in English though. Regardless, I'll be home in a few weeks, so I should enjoy all the French before I have to leave!